Frozen Forever

Do I always have to feel this way all the time? The sands of time are running but never stop. The feelings they spit at me is constant and I hate it. I always end up being pushed to the sidelines. And I do not matter at all. At least in a years time I'll be free. I won't need to pull myself along all the time - persuading myself that things will be easier, better. But a year seems like a long time away. Too long. Within that year, what I wonder will I have accomplished? Where will life take me. Hopefully, far away from here. Far away from those who hang at my throat by their sharp claws, scratching to see the blood. The blood crawling from my neck. Please someone take me away. Or at least make it bearable. Make it easier so that I don't have to hide. Send me an angel. Anything. Anything at all. I just want to be set free. I don't want to be the target of their disgust anymore. I don't want to be the target of their refusal, their ignorance, their sneers and laughter. I promise I've tried to do things right but, tell me now, what have I done to deserve this? I work hard constantly. I'm a good student. Oh, but is that possibly it? Is it that I'm better than them that they hate? Pfft. Probably not. I mean, what do I have that anyone could possibly envy? What? Well, honestly, I don't need them. Or their contact. I can thrive alone. On my own. Just me. Forgotten and twisted. Is that what I am to them? They probably believe the rumours. Well, that's all yesterdays news. I'm hoping they'll forget everything over the summer because more than likely I won't.